Happy 2020 to everyone ❤️
I always find it valuable to look over the year that has passed and allow myself to feel deep appreciation for everything that has shaped the experience of the year for me and also to recognise the growth in myself and all the blessings that I have received. I am writing this to enable me to share the gratitude and to inspire.
The picture above is the vision board I created for 2019 and before dismantling it and creating a new one for this year, I want to recognise and celebrate all the things that have manifested for me in the past year.
The year was very challenging for me, as I know it has been for many people. I want to mention that there were a few months earlier in the year where I experienced heaviness, fear and anxiety. I was depressed, in fear and finding my way back to trusting and allowing at a whole new level. Honestly I did not enjoy this process much or the feelings that came with it but kept taking each day as it came and doing my best. DEEP REST is how I interpret the word depressed and it was very difficult for me to allow myself to experience it fully. Old parts of me that were ready to be let go of kept challenging me to listen to them and to keep them on board, beliefs about needing to work hard to be able to survive, amongst them. I just wanted to share a bit of this to make it clear that I experience the shadow, as well as the light and I also feel it deeply. By enlarge I did this journey by myself because of my belief that I am Superwoman and I can do it all – who hasn’t had that belief and experience? The question I ask myself now is ‘If I am meant to do this all by myself – why am I on a planet with approx. 7.7 billion other people? ‘ Thankfully I have done ALOT of work on myself and my beliefs (work in progress) and I did reach out and allow a couple of close friends help me through this time for whom I am truly grateful. I am also grateful to myself for allowing the RECEIVING of this help. Aaah that’s another blog altogether.
Now onto the celebration of my manifested visions. I have circled the ones that I would like to recognise and honour here.
The feather is a wonderful reminder that my angels, guides and supporters – seen and unseen are always with me and helping me. This “knowing” is such a wonderful gift and when I find feathers on my walks – it always lights me up and my heart is always grateful. We can sometimes forget about this support and having it on my vision board is a great visual reminder to ask for help when I need it and to be grateful for all the signs and help that I do receive daily.
The light grid connecting the earth is also a reminder that we are all part of a bigger picture, that we are all connected, that there is light within and surrounding us at all times. In this year it has been a slow but gradual journey for me allowing myself to connect on a deeper level to myself and thus to everyone else. The support and gifts of the Earth is also recognised in this picture for me.
As mentioned previously my TRUST has definitely been tested time and again and the experiences throughout the year have deepened my ability to feel it, to trust TRUST. This was basically during my darker, heavier months of feeling this year when I was not trusting – it was trust calling me back to itself.
The soaring high – well that happened in a real visceral experience for me at ‘SOUL MAGIC’ Retreat with Lee Harris Energy in Costa Rica where I joined a few courageous souls on a three hour zip line tour. Courageous … hmmm maybe a bit naive – that’s how I felt when they handed me the gloves with special padding to slow myself down on the line!! What the?! LOL . I have experienced an enjoyed zip lining in Tasmania and New Zealand but this was by far the highest, longest and dare I say it SH** your pants kind of experience. It was also me BEing courageous, taking a deep breath and making the most of this exhilarating, scary venturing into the unknown. The big open army truck drive up the unsealed and washed out dirt roads began this adventure, getting bogged and stuck on the way back, the close encounter with black howler monkeys, huge spider holes, deadly wasp sighting, injured team mate with burn marks from the line on her hand and arm, was all a rewarding, adrenaline pumping adventure highlighted with incredible views, soul family supporting each other and a swim under an incredible waterfall. Not the kind of soaring high I had imagined when I put the words on my vision board… in fact this was much much more than I could have imagined.
The connection, courage and elevation also happened on that trip through Peru with my friend Marilyn and the retreat at Costa Rica. As well as in my community with the amazing network of women and friends that I am blessed with.’ Breathe easy’ were also an interesting choice of words on my vision board and I certainly received another level of appreciation from our Peru trip, where at higher altitudes breathing becomes a labour of work. I received such a deep appreciation of the simple, daily gift of breathing with ease, that not everyone in this world can appreciate daily.
I placed the picture of the hummingbird on my vision board for the beauty of it and the words that came with it -“Legends say that hummingbirds float free of time, carrying our hopes for love, joy and celebration. The hummingbird’s delicate grace reminds us that life is rich, beauty is everywhere, every personal connection has meaning and that laughter is life’s sweetest creation”. These words have certainly been felt by me in the last year and the complete surprise for me was the actual hummingbird that we saw in Lima on our first day of our trip. This was such a magical and breathtaking experience for me, as I had not even imagined seeing this gorgeous bird in nature. We saw many more on that trip around bird feeders that were strategically placed but this first one was by far the most magical for me because it was such a surprise and in an urban area. It had never occurred to me when I had crafted my vision board that I would actually see a real hummingbird in nature.
Macchu Picchu has been a spiritual place of interest, magic and excitement which also ‘happened’ for me in the last year and to be honest when I placed that picture on my vision board I was just happy for it to be there and had no idea how it would happen or even if it would happen in that year. I was happy to know that I would go one day and was blown away that it happened in 2019. I am still so deeply grateful for the support from my dear friend and soul sister Marilyn for sharing this journey and helping make it possible.
The central picture of the lighthouse was also a reminder for me of BEing the lighthouse and allowing myself to shine my light brightly and the value of that simple task, without the DOing to prove to others or myself of my worth. It was a good visual reminder, yet again I did not consciously see myself at a lighthouse – yet I found myself with dear soul family bringing in 2020 at Byron Bay Lighthouse, also seeing this in real life. My heart expands just at the realisation of this magical power of holding a vision and taking steps towards it.
The $100 notes were there to instil a feeling of abundance and to allow me to feel safe and looked after in the financial areas of my life. This is a feeling that comes and goes for me. Magically and again thanks to my friends and family – all the money that was needed for my endeavours this last year was available and I am so, so grateful for that. I continue to trust that I am always taken care of and am also aware of the action required to BE in this space. The words ‘It is easy for me to give and receive gifts graciously’ has certainly helped in this area and my awareness of the need for the flow.
I am currently so happy that I found my red Mazda that also was on the board (bottom right hand corner) and am really joy full and grateful for her. She is known as Magical Marvella. 🙂
As I am taking one last look at the board, which I am a bit hesitant to dismantle, I also notice the island picture on the lower right near the frangipani flower and my thoughts turn to my next adventure that has been in the planning stages all last year. The amazing and wonderful ultimate girls week away in Fiji featuring Elizabeth Gilbert and so many other amazing, incredible women. This epic event was imagined, created and shared by my dear friend and soul sister, Liesel and it has been such a ride already getting it all happening and I have witnessed so much growth and expansion in everyone involved during the planning stages and am so so grateful to be a part of this transformative event which is happening in February 2020.
I had a wonderful realisation around JOY as well. There have been many things that I have been grateful for but I had not recognised those moments as feeling JOY. It is a mindset that needed to be reset for me. Even though I had deep appreciation for all the wonderful things that happen in my life – I had never allowed myself to realise that there were times of joy, so I now allow myself to realise that I am feeling Joy when I am grateful for the experiences.
BEing myself has become a practice and wonderful journey. Allowing me to be who I am, first needed discovery. I had become lost in the beliefs and programs in my subconscious and in life, in the DOing. It has been so worth exploring, letting go, discovering myself, my needs and is an ongoing, exciting, changing landscape. I believe the knowing and trust in my guidance and the courage to walk this path in an ever expanding consciously aware way is what continues to bring these beautiful gifts.
Thank you for sharing this journey with me. This is part of my new allowing of BEing seen and heard, of feeling significant and I thank you for being here and being a part of that important stage of my journey.
To finish I would like to share this important formula which is necessary in achieving our dreams and our visions. The reminder that action is always involved in success.
Intention + Action = Outcome
Much Love to you all ❤️